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When I read his response, I was instantly offended and am not even a bigger woman. I have worked as a personal trainer for the “bigger” people that want to lose weight. In reality, this is an ironic position for me because I do not believe in working out to lose weight. I believe in working out to improve your health, increase your energy, improve self esteem, and aid in dealing with issues such as depression (Note: Exercise does not do the same as counseling or prescriptions and should not be substituted for those.). Sometimes, no matter how hard they push themselves, how long or frequently they work out, they can't lose weight. There can be medical reasons for this, not to mention that there are genetic factors that cause people to be overweight. I for one had an injury that prevented me from being able to exercise for a little over a year. For some people, it's nearly impossible to lose weight. Even if they exercise, they remain the same weight. For those people, please don't let that stop you from exercising. Even if you can't see physical improvements, you may have major health improvements. Not to mention, some of those medical problems can be partially managed by exercise. Just because people can't lose weight, doesn't mean that they are incapable of being loved. There are a lot of people that prefer those that aren't skin and bones. Also, just because someone puts “it's what is on the inside that counts”, doesn't mean they are overweight. I believe my personality is the best part about me, so if I were to write a personal ad, I would probably say that too. I am not overweight, am quite athletic, and receive compliments about the way I look all the time. Don't let anyone tell you that you have to be skinny to be loved. Size, to me, does not matter. On a side note, if you are overweight and are trying to lose a few pounds, please be careful. It's a good idea to talk to your doctor before you begin to exercise. At most exercise facilities, there are people there that will show you how to use machines, proper techniques and even set up a workout routine for you. Also, keep in mind that you may actually see yourself gaining weight at the start of working out. You are gaining muscle and losing fat at the same time, but muscle weighs more than fat. Stick it out for a couple weeks and you should see that change. If you increase weight on a machine, you will gain more muscle. If you are trying to lose weight or tone your body, you should increase the number of sets or reps rather than weight. And do it for yourself, not anyone else.

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Good Job Sam! I agree whole heartedly. And before people start commenting on me. Yes I am short and a bit fat. But Sam speaks the truth. People do judge by the cover. I remember a TV news program. They were asking women about attraction. The showed women a bunch of men. Who out of the group would they choose. One man was a millionaire - wanted to get married. Was intelligent like a doctor or something. But you would think out of the group of men he would be a prime pick. He got picked last by all women. Why he was SHORT. SHORT is to women what FAT is to MEN. Women you are lucky you can diet, lipo, corset. Us short men we have to live with it. ANd sorry shoe lifts do not work. Also the The Annies are right to a degree. Some attraction is trained by media. The media has been training us that thinner is better. Many people are annoyed at that and want to switch it on its head - FATTER is better. Heck I think most men would be fine with NORMAL weight. But when we are being told that FAT is normal and to accept it. And I not saying rubenesque fat I am saying WOMEN that are FAT.

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Regarding the man that likes women not terribly overweight; there was a documentary on TV a few years ago about some tribe in the middle of the Amazon jungle where the men took women to be their wives and they wanted the ones with the hourglass small waist to hip, ample breast ratio. They never saw television, magazines or the media, just the tribal women in their local communities. It has to do with being able to reproduce. "Hot bod" equates to you know what, higher libido etc., etc., children...then they took another wife. Women and men who take care of themselves are more likely to take care of each other. Health care is so expensive, it is so much better to do the best you can to find your healthiest path. I have been on both sides of this dilemna, it is much more depressing and unhealthy to be lax, and why would anyone want me like that. We must do the best we can and not just say accept me as I am and not even have a healthy lifestyle. My neighbor just lost five pounds, and two inches off her waist in a couple of weeks doing Wii Fit, (not affiliated wth the company), there is no reason for much of the unhealthy over weight in many people. Those of us that are not stuck in some horrible post accident or horrendous disease issue should be grateful and taking care of ourselves. Love yourself enough to do what is best for yourself as often as possible. Put your trauma/dramas behind you through prayer, therapy, or talking to a friend. We all have them, move on and be there for yourself and others. Develop interests in life, you don't need a mate to be happy. Sure it is great when it works, but there are other fantastic things in life to give a life meaning. Volunteer, read, enjoy the arts, the outdoors, travel, write. Men don't want doormats either, they want women who are interesting and interested in something else besides them. Do something. Learn to cook healthy. Exercise and you won't be so tired after work. Do more with less because less is more.

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The comment from the man who said woman should lose a little weight made my blood boil!!! Most men trolling for women on online dating services are in no possition to be so judgemental. How many are balding middleaged men with pot bellies? -Not that there is anything wrong with that per-say, but I'd say the average woman does more to keep up her appearances then men of the same age range do. And if they think they are allowed to have a double standard in this area then they are crazy!! They should be greatful that we as women are more forgiving of THEIR flaws, otherwise most men would probably never see any action!!! I am proud of who I am the way I am and no man who doesnt appreciate that is worth MY time!!!

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The comment from the man who said woman should lose a little weight made my blood boil!!! Most men trolling for women on online dating services are in no possition to be so judgemental. How many are balding middleaged men with pot bellies? -Not that there is anything wrong with that per-say, but I'd say the average woman does more to keep up her appearances then men of the same age range do. And if they think they are allowed to have a double standard in this area then they are crazy!! They should be greatful that we as women are more forgiving of THEIR flaws, otherwise most men would probably never see any action!!! I am proud of who I am the way I am and no man who doesnt appreciate that is worth MY time!!!

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The comments from Sam were really low mentality. I bet he is a bald middle aged man with a pot belly large breasts knobby knees no self esteem and has to lie to get a female to answer his loney heart club ad. It;s too bad in todays society there are still narrow minded & shallow people like him . It is people like him that have 6 &7 year old girls on diets. Like the song said 'Every one is beautiful in their own way"