Dear Ann Landers: I am a 27-year-old woman currently living in a large house with three roommates — two male, one female. One of the guys, "Eddie," owns the house.
I think Eddie is obsessive-compulsive. He pastes our names on the silverware so we know which fork to use. He has assigned us parking spots, even though we have no parking lot and use a public street. He posts a calendar for us to mark off which days we are using the laundry facilities. I once put a mark on the wrong day, and instead of erasing it, he got a new calendar.
I could live with his quirks except for one thing: He often tells me personal, intimate things about his life, including how much he longs for someone special to be with. I get the distinct impression he wants that someone to be me.
Eddie doesn't frighten me, but I'm uncomfortable around him.
I don't want to move out, Ann. The rent is cheap; I have my own room; and the other roommates are great. I cannot afford anything better. The only solution I've found is to work late and spend as much time in my room as possible. Do you have any other suggestions? — Whacked Out in the West
Dear Whacked: It sounds as if Eddie has some strudel in his noodle. He's a control freak and not about to change. Start looking around for other living quarters pronto, and see whether you can find a pal or two to join you.
Dear Ann Landers: My 23-year-old daughter is engaged to marry a young man I cannot stand. She seems very happy, and that is the most important thing, but the relationship worries me. "Francine" used to date a fellow I adored, but they broke up.
Francine is living with Cal now, and they have a joint bank account. He has a so-so job but never pays for anything if he can help it. Restaurant meals and movie tickets are always on her. He has no ambition to attend college, and I am sure Francine will end up supporting him, which galls me to no end. I am civil in Cal's presence, but just barely. He constantly puts Francine down, and I invariably find myself defending her.
I have begged Francine to wait another year before making a final commitment, but she refuses. Her brother just married, and I wonder whether she is competing with him. Is there anything I can do? — Pennsylvania
Dear Penn.: Yes, you can stop knocking Cal and do your darndest to find something about him to admire. This will baffle Francine. Do not mention the old boyfriend you like, or she never will go near him. Meanwhile, keep busy, and pay as little attention as possible to your daughter's social life. A 23-year-old woman might interpret her mother's "guidance" as interference and marry the guy to assert her independence.
When planning a wedding, who pays for what? Who stands where? "The Ann Landers Guide for Brides" has all the answers. Send a self-addressed, long, business-sized envelope and a check or money order for $3.75 (this includes postage and handling) to: Brides, c/o Ann Landers, c/o Creators Syndicate, 5777 W. Century Blvd., Suite 700, Los Angeles, CA 90045. To find out more about Ann Landers and read her past columns, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.
ANN LANDERS (R)
COPYRIGHT 2008 CREATORS SYNDICATE INC.
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