Q. My wife and I retired last year. We lollygag around, gain weight and watch too much television. We are tired from our years of working and raising our family. How can we change our routine?

A. The old joke is true: Retirement is not for sissies!

All kidding aside, retirement becomes a new job and new chapter in our lives. It is a time when most of use will face serious challenges, such as financial and health issues, rising food prices and inflation, family issues, sexual dysfunctions, obesity, and even hair loss. What's more, the new stresses can shorten our lives.

Common causes of frustration for retired people are unrealistic expectations, unexpected conflicts and demands from other people. The key to successfully dealing with these issues is choosing the right way to cope. For me, it's focusing on the positives instead of the negative.

The first thing you must do is make sure you have no health issues that will keep you from successfully changing your lifestyle. Your doctor might recommend a stress test. This is a noninvasive technique to determine how efficiently your heart is pumping blood. But once you are cleared, you must consider taking a different approach to retired life.

For example, consider how you handle rejection, criticism, financial reversals and other negatives. The commonsense way to cope with these challenges is to refuse to let the small stuff get you down and to look for the humor in every situation. Laughter is the best medicine.

Finally, retirement is the time to meet your own needs. Let things go, both materialistically and emotionally. Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does. Develop new social connections, exercise, which will improve your mood, and volunteer.

You now have fewer boundaries. You have retired from work, but not from life. Be strong enough to let go and brave enough to enjoy your newfound freedom!

Q. Recently a friend from the retirement community where we live had a fall and needed to be rushed to the hospital. I called her daughter, who lives nearby. Later I learned that my friend needed surgery. I was alarmed to learn hospital personnel had told my friend's daughter she no legal right to make medical decisions for her mother. How can I prevent this from happening to me?

A. If you are ever incapacitated, it is crucial that you have already prepared and signed two powers of attorney. One power of attorney would name an agent to handle your finances. The other would name a person to make your medical decisions. You can choose anyone — a spouse, family member, friend, or professional - to act as your agent. It can be the same person on both documents, or two different people, whatever you wish.

Durable powers of attorney can be tailored for specific or broad decisions, whichever makes you comfortable. These documents guarantee that, in the event you are incapacitated, your agents will be legally permitted to make decisions for you based on your previously stated wishes.

The health care proxy details your choices regarding life-support and other medical issues. It is an excellent idea to share copies of your powers of attorney with your family and your agents so you can discuss them in advance.

I tape a copy to my refrigerator door in the event the paramedics come. Getting rid of responsibilities relieves a lot of stress. Many of us have only told our family and friends verbally about our wishes in case of an emergency like your friend's. But the only way to ensure our wishes are followed is to stop procrastinating and prepare our powers of attorney now!

To find out more about Doug Mayberry and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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