Q. A number of my friends tell me they keep a journal. I really don't know what that is. They believe it serves as a memory bank and keeps them focused. Should I begin one?

A.Yes, especially because as we age we become somewhat forgetful. A journal is not a diary. It is an ongoing written notebook describing your daily thoughts and actions. I use mine to prioritize my plans, organize ideas for the future and scribble personal reminders about things like important phone calls. I note my day's activities, why I am thankful, along with my dreams and affirmations.

Journals can be all encompassing, without restrictions. By flipping pages you can reminisce and evaluate what you did and why you chose to do it. Did you have good day, were you angry when your daughter failed to call, why did you spend so much for a new coat? It helps us to organize the myriad thoughts that pass through our minds every day.

Over time, we become aware of how frequently we change our attitudes, choices, and goals. We remind ourselves about the importance of friendships, how our relationships with our partners are flourishing, to count our blessings, to be thankful for our health, and to encourage ourselves to be more positive. Re-reading our journal entries helps us to understand ourselves, reinforces our self-esteem and helps us balance our perspective. It reminds us not to be so serious and to laugh and enjoy life along the way.

Recounting your thoughts can make you wiser, more aware of your habits, help you avoid repeating mistakes and to really think about the results of your actions. Other benefits are to establish priorities, give yourself a little private time to consider your spiritual beliefs and to review your budget. It's all about you. Some medical professionals believe journaling can even benefit your health.

Having your information conveniently located also saves time and reduces inconvenience. One piece of advice, though, if you have entries you want to keep secret, you should keep your journal hidden!

Q. My husband died in an auto accident at age 67 one year ago. We had a happy marriage. But I feel the time has come for me to move on. I am looking for another partner. So far, no luck! I am 62 years old. Where are the best places to find one?

A. There are many options. One of the best is to alert your family, friends and neighbors that you are lonely and would appreciate an introduction to any good prospects. It's been my observation that happily married women like to pair new couples.

Focus your energy on searching for and frequenting the places where singles congregate. Good options are class reunions, clubs, volunteer organizations, sporting events, hiking trails, travel organizations and tour groups, churches and synagogues, political rallies, spas and gyms, and neighborhood activities.

Beware the fear of failure. It is easy to become discouraged and be overcome by the belief that there is no man out there for you. Remember, it is possible to find a new partner if you are passionate about your goal.

Knowledge is power. Action is power! Do not allow yourself to procrastinate.

Doug Mayberry makes the most of life after work in a Southern California retirement community. Contact him at deardoug@msn.com. To find out more about Doug Mayberry and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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