Q: In an effort to wise me up, my grandfather often chatted with me about his life experiences. I was his oldest grandson and it seemed that he was endeavoring to teach me the importance a positive attitude plays in overcoming obstacles. Now I am facing critical decisions. I feel like I should have paid more attention to his wisdom. I have blown a major career opportunity by putting myself in a position to help raise my grandchildren. How can I best cope?

A: For as long as the sun has risen in the east, grandparents have struggled to pass their wisdom to their grandchildren. But even the most well-meaning grandparents find it difficult to get the message across to a young and impatient generation.

Often we become wiser indirectly by observing what happens to others. It would seem that you have the perfect opportunity to turn your dilemma into a learning experience for your grandchildren. I suggest you do more than tell your grandchildren, show them that so-called failures can be steppingstones on the path to wisdom and happiness.

Most grandparents have been around long enough to know that wisdom comes through trial and error. They know that becoming wise is a process, that some individuals become wise naturally. They also know that others, regardless of age or experience, never quite get it.

That is why it is important that you let your grandchildren know a little rain will fall on their lives and that a sunny attitude is their best help in getting through dark times. After all, success can be simply described as getting up one more time than we fall down.

If you want to pass on your wisdom, you must get your young audience to pay attention. A positive, uplifting example is equally important for you. Encourage your grandchildren to love themselves and to love others. Make sure to tell them how much you love them, too.

Remember, we become wise when we process our life's experiences, good and bad, into insight and principles. Explain to your grandchildren that life is a percentage game. You can still be happy even if you fail to score 100 percent all the time.

Q: My husband and I are both retiring soon. We have purchased a retirement home, gotten rid of "stuff" and are mentally ready to begin our new life. One thing we are considering is committing to volunteer work as a way to give back to the community. We want to share volunteering as a partnership. What would be our best approach?

A: Congratulations! The winning charity will appreciate your participation, and so will you. You will benefit from the positive feelings that grow out of the knowledge that you are making a difference in the lives of others.

And your timing couldn't better. Charities and non-profits in the United States are experiencing lean times. Donations of time and money are dwindling. In many ways, charities operate like businesses. They need volunteer participation to do the job. For example, Meals on Wheels is suffering because the rising price of gasoline has forced many volunteers to cut back on the miles they can drive.

Volunteering is full of surprises, and some are unpleasant. You need to be ready to handle the disappointments and failures that can come with trying to help. But the upside far outweighs the downside. Frequently, other volunteers become a part of your social life.

Where should you go to volunteer? The opportunities are endless. Churches, museums, food banks, service clubs, children's organizations, hospitals, and libraries are all eager for your assistance.

How should you choose? If you follow your passion, the chances are you find appreciation and happiness. Select a group or organization with goals that match your own.

You can begin with a trial period. Remember, it's OK for volunteers to resign and choose another charity. For the most part, it will be a win-win situation. As you strive to help others, you will be able forget your own troubles.

No matter which charity you choose, strive to enjoy each day. In five years you will remember today's events as the "the good old days!"

To find out more about Doug Mayberry and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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