Hey, Cherie!

This is very embarrassing. I am a 16-year-old girl who has a reputation of not being a good kisser. I don't know if this reputation is true or not, but a friend of a friend from camp sent me an instant message — after Jeremy and I had gone out over the summer, he said that I wasn't a good kisser.

I was going out with this guy Jeremy; it could be true that Jeremy said I wasn't a great kisser. I feel weird asking an advice columnist for kissing tips, but I'd feel stranger asking my friends. So if you could help me, I would really appreciate it.

I am not one of those girls who would even think about sex before I am 18, or maybe not even until I am married. But I think that kissing is OK if you really care for the person. I hate the idea that what I do isn't good or right.

— Mis-Kissed

Hey, Mis-Kissed!

I'm charmed. That's not what you want to hear, but I defy any "Hey, Cherie!" reader who lacks a heart made of stone, no matter what age, not to be rooting for you. Now, I've kissed a few boys in my time — only my husband Jeff during the last 18 years — so I think I might be able to give some good advice.

Rule No. 1: Kissing in public equals yuck. Public displays of affection are so late 20th century; they weren't cool then, and they aren't cool now. Handholding, yes. Lip locking? Not yet. Rule No. 2: Fresh breath. Gum helps, but please spit it out before you kiss. Rule No. 3: Relax your lips. No one wants to kiss what used to be the Berlin Wall. Rule No. 4: Neither the Sahara nor the Pacific. Not so dry that you could be kissing your dachshund on the back, or so slobbery that you could be the dachshund itself.

Rule No. 5: Don't forget to breathe though your nose. Rule No. 6: Easy with your tongue — probably not the first time you kiss a guy, maybe not even the second. And your tongue is not a deadly weapon. Rule No. 7: Remember the person you are kissing. And if you don't like the person, please stop kissing immediately. Say sorry, but stop. This goes for girls and guys, since "Hey Cherie!" readers are readers of integrity.

Hey, Cherie!

Have you ever gotten into a physical fight? I know that in some past columns you said that girls should learn karate or tae kwon do, but you never said if you took classes. If you did, did you ever use it?

— Curious About You

Hey, Curious!

My big thing about learning self-defense is that there are plenty of indecent people to contend with, even for decent people. Knowing that you can defend yourself can make you a lot more confident than realizing you could get hurt.

I never learned self-defense moves and probably won't start now. But if I were a teen again, there's not a doubt in my mind that I'd want to go all the way to black belt ... and hope I wouldn't need to use my skills against another person except in the karate dojo.

Cherie Bennett is a best-selling author of books for teens and young adults. Visit her website at www.cheriebennett.com. To find out more about Cherie Bennett and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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