Inside Relationships from Creators Syndicate

Hormones Trigger Conflict, Peace for 07/18/2008

Fri, 18 Jul 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Once a month she hates me, and I can't do anything right. It's like clock work, so it must be hormones. But sometimes I wonder if she's always unhappy with the relationship … and the truth only comes out once a month.

A wise man! Even hormonal shifts can only trigger existing feelings.

Christiane Northrup explains that PMS, SAD (seasonal affective disorder) and perimenopa ...

Updated: Fri Jul 18, 2008

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Love Raises Sexual Satisfaction for 07/25/2008

Fri, 25 Jul 2008 00:00:00 -0700

According to a new study, half of married/partnered women are dissatisfied with their sex life … and I'm guessing some of the other half were afraid to admit to it.

Our satisfaction — men's and women's — correlates with how much disparity there is between what we have and what we want. What's not clear is what we really want versus what we've been programmed to want.

W ...

Updated: Fri Jul 25, 2008

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Help Kids Expand Comfort Zone for 08/01/2008

Fri, 01 Aug 2008 00:00:00 -0700

I have a dilemma … I love my girlfriend to death, and I'm sure we'll get married one day, but my little girl (who's 21 and in school) won't hear of it. When she was only 9 years old, her mother died … and since then, she's had me all to herself. My girlfriend has two children of her own, and although my daughter is very confident, I think she's afraid of being outnumbered and losing me.
Updated: Fri Aug 01, 2008

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Long and Short of Distance for 08/08/2008

Fri, 08 Aug 2008 00:00:00 -0700

When you hear of long distance relationships, you might think new global dating spurred by the Internet and more efficient travel. But there are people who live in the same house and still see each other only on weekends.

Truck drivers, sales people, engineers, consultants, airline personnel and a host of others, including politicians, might spend as much time away as they spend at home ...

Updated: Fri Aug 08, 2008

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Self-Verification Attracts for 08/15/2008

Fri, 15 Aug 2008 00:00:00 -0700

"The best women will always be attracted to the men with the strongest convictions," writes one reader.

Maybe he's on to something, assuming that the men with the strongest convictions also live by them. We're all looking for our way, so when somebody seems to have found theirs, that somebody (male or female) can be very attractive.

I'm not talking about arrogant or narr ...

Updated: Fri Aug 15, 2008

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The Bored Are Unfulfilled for 08/22/2008

Fri, 22 Aug 2008 00:00:00 -0700

We have more leisure time and more leisure-time options than ever. But more often than we admit it, we are most bored when we have free time and can choose to do whatever we wish!

Studies suggest that boredom during unoccupied time predicts substance abuse, smoking, poor health and loneliness. The same studies also suggest a surprisingly easy fix.

Boredom is based primarily, not o ...

Updated: Fri Aug 22, 2008

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$ Problems Can Bring You Together for 08/29/2008

Fri, 29 Aug 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Couples list money as one of the top three reasons they argue … so take care not to let today's economic plunge take your relationship down.

Whether you've lost your job, picked up a second one to meet rising costs, or found an opportunity to help yourself and others, your relationship is bound to feel stressed. But stress doesn't have to take a threatening hold. It can bring yo ...

Updated: Fri Aug 29, 2008

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Opposites Attract, Complement, Don't Complete for 09/05/2008

Fri, 05 Sep 2008 00:00:00 -0700

"Relationships don't work when people get hooked up with opposites, instead of partners with similar traits who like what they like," says one reader.

Not bad … but it's not quite that simple.

"Similar" is most apt to work after two people have accepted who they are, and are no longer trying to get somebody else to give them what they "lack." ...

Updated: Fri Sep 05, 2008

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Can Cheating Be Redefined? for 09/12/2008

Fri, 12 Sep 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Recently, I have become reacquainted with an old high school friend. He told me that he and his wife have not had sex for about 10 years — they have been married for 45 — and he has decided to go outside his marriage and have an affair.

I say, "No, no, no, that is not the right answer." But I do understand his position. She has made it clear she is not intereste ...

Updated: Fri Sep 12, 2008

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Habits Dictate Health of Relationships for 09/19/2008

Fri, 19 Sep 2008 00:00:00 -0700

We continually choose what "makes" us happy or unhappy. But if we do it out of habit — or by default — we may scarcely realize that we can and do choose.

Each of our choices yields a consequence. And we learn from consequences. Unfortunately, part of what we learn perpetuates the negative — and keeps us from doing something about it.

If, for example, so ...

Updated: Fri Sep 19, 2008

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Men Have Their Own Brand of "PMS" for 09/26/2008

Fri, 26 Sep 2008 00:00:00 -0700

"PMS" triggers what troubles us … and so do some other things. Fatigue, hunger, a bad day or a headache can all bring out our frustrations.

Women are not alone in their frustration; they just have a monthly cycle to help them manage it … especially worth noting in the heat of today's politics.

Women are more apt to let their activity revolve around the men in their lives ...

Updated: Fri Sep 26, 2008

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Desire Also Arouses Partner for 10/03/2008

Fri, 03 Oct 2008 00:00:00 -0700

He's just not that interested in sex anymore … and desire has always been a big turn-on for me.

She said the words, without realizing their significance, during a weekend retreat designed to help her and her husband restore intimacy in their relationship. Women want to be sexually desired. It's in their genes … and, for the most part, they work at it.

So, when men don't d ...

Updated: Fri Oct 03, 2008

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Fun of Flirting Can Be Cut Short for 10/10/2008

Fri, 10 Oct 2008 00:00:00 -0700

"She's a cutie — if I weren't married, she's somebody I'd flirt with," says my husband, Sam.

She had just asked (with a becoming smile), before taking our order, "Two Caesars and a Turkey Asiago?"

We're predictable; but that's not what this is about. It is about the charm and attraction of those we encounter and our inclination to flirt with them ...

Updated: Fri Oct 10, 2008

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Emotions Play Yo-Yo Tricks for 10/17/2008

Fri, 17 Oct 2008 00:00:00 -0700

We're bound to wonder why somebody else — you know, the loose cannon down the street — can't seem to commit (or break away, as the case may be) once and for all. But we don't have to look that far to find an emotional roller coaster. Chances are there's somebody under your own roof you adore one minute and want to blast to the moon the next.

We lack the blasting powe ...

Updated: Fri Oct 17, 2008

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For Richer, For Poorer for 10/24/2008

Fri, 24 Oct 2008 00:00:00 -0700

If you didn't really stop to think about those words — for richer, for poorer — before you said them, they might be ringing in your ears.

You don't have to lose your fortune, or your life's savings, to realize how quickly it could happen. It doesn't matter who you are or how hard or long you worked for it, it's up for grabs. Well, almost.

Today's economic crisis, like ...

Updated: Fri Oct 24, 2008

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Get Your Deal Breakers Out in the Open for 10/31/2008

Fri, 31 Oct 2008 00:00:00 -0700

We all have "deal breakers," but we don't all talk about them — or even think about them!

Hey, if we acknowledge them, especially out loud, then we look foolish ignoring them. And sometimes that's exactly what we prefer to do. It's tough enough to strike a deal with somebody, right? You might not give much thought to what makes it, let alone what could break it.

Bu ...

Updated: Fri Oct 31, 2008

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Guilt Masquerades for 11/07/2008

Fri, 07 Nov 2008 00:00:00 -0800

I finally realize that the reason I keep moving from one woman to the next is that I'm afraid I'll cheat again. It's been six years since my divorce, but I am still pained by my behavior. And I don't want to hurt anybody else.

We might assume that people don't commit because they want newness or variety, but sometimes they're just afraid … not only of hurting somebody else but o ...

Updated: Fri Nov 07, 2008

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You Are Love for 11/14/2008

Fri, 14 Nov 2008 00:00:00 -0800

From the time we learn the word "no," we begin to get the message that what we would do naturally is "bad."

As young children, we can't make a distinction between our behavior and ourselves, so we buy into a lie — the lie that in order to be good enough we have to sit still and be quiet, or look pretty, or something. But you know as well as I do that some of the ...

Updated: Fri Nov 14, 2008

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Insecurity Gets Starring Role for 11/21/2008

Fri, 21 Nov 2008 00:00:00 -0800

Years ago, while I was dating a psychiatrist, he told me that I was too often disappointed with him. I was goo-gah over his brain, and he melted me — and everybody else — when he smiled. He saw through people and felt warm toward them; and they knew it. Disappointed in him? Not this girl.

Bless my insecure little 30-year-old heart, though, I acted like I was. Because I felt i ...

Updated: Fri Nov 21, 2008

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Let Love Write Your Holiday Story for 11/28/2008

Fri, 28 Nov 2008 00:00:00 -0800

If stress is the difference between what we want and what we have, we could easily feel like sitting ducks this holiday season.

We all have a story about what we want in life, but we tend to paint more detailed pictures around the special occasion chapters. And those pictures, or expectations, leave us wide open to being disappointed — or stressed.

So why not get rid of our ...

Updated: Fri Nov 28, 2008

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Inside Relationships from Creators Syndicate

Hormones Trigger Conflict, Peace for 07/18/2008

Love Raises Sexual Satisfaction for 07/25/2008

Help Kids Expand Comfort Zone for 08/01/2008

Long and Short of Distance for 08/08/2008

Self-Verification Attracts for 08/15/2008

The Bored Are Unfulfilled for 08/22/2008

$ Problems Can Bring You Together for 08/29/2008

Opposites Attract, Complement, Don't Complete for 09/05/2008

Can Cheating Be Redefined? for 09/12/2008

Habits Dictate Health of Relationships for 09/19/2008

Men Have Their Own Brand of "PMS" for 09/26/2008

Desire Also Arouses Partner for 10/03/2008

Fun of Flirting Can Be Cut Short for 10/10/2008

Emotions Play Yo-Yo Tricks for 10/17/2008

For Richer, For Poorer for 10/24/2008

Get Your Deal Breakers Out in the Open for 10/31/2008

Guilt Masquerades for 11/07/2008

You Are Love for 11/14/2008

Insecurity Gets Starring Role for 11/21/2008

Let Love Write Your Holiday Story for 11/28/2008