Sylvia Rimm on Raising Kids from Creators Syndicate

All Children Need Play for 06/29/2008

Sun, 29 Jun 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Q. I have a gifted kindergartner whose favorite form of entertainment is learning. He doesn't enjoy active games or toys, but only wants to learn. He loves going to museums, watching the history or science channels, reading books and going to classical music concerts. I have always tried to get him information on whatever he is interested in, whether it is a book, activity or taking him to a mu ...

Updated: Sun Jun 29, 2008

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Sensitive Child Needs Evaluation for 07/02/2008

Wed, 02 Jul 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Q. My 7-year-old daughter is very sensitive to correction. Any time we correct a behavior that is unacceptable, she'll either cry or get very sarcastic in self-defense. She also complains about almost everything, like not having the right shoes, not having the right shirt, her sister is singing too loudly, etc. She's the youngest of three. If she's put in a time-out for something, she'll yell t ...

Updated: Wed Jul 02, 2008

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Ten-Year-Old Can Sleep Alone for 07/06/2008

Sun, 06 Jul 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Q. I've been divorced for five years and have a 10-year-old son. My ex-husband sleeps with my son, and I feel this is unhealthy. My son is afraid to sleep in his bedroom in the basement, but I believe that could be solved. The real problem is that his father wants to sleep with him, although no sexual abuse is involved. My ex feels he doesn't see his son enough. When he brings our son back from ...

Updated: Sun Jul 06, 2008

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A Barbeque-Only Family for 07/09/2008

Wed, 09 Jul 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Q. I have three nephews age 10, 8 and 5, and a niece age 2. I enjoy spending time with them every now and then, but I can't tolerate any meals with them. It's too gross.

When we get to the table, my sister and her husband refuse to put the 2-year-old in a high chair, so they have to hold her or steady her on a seat. She cries and screams during the whole meal. Her parents don't cut her f ...

Updated: Wed Jul 09, 2008

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Granddaughter Needs Both Counseling And Support for 07/13/2008

Sun, 13 Jul 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Q. My 16-year-old granddaughter was raised by my son for most of her life. Her mother was around, but I think my granddaughter felt abandoned at times. She's a beautiful, smart girl who was given huge amounts of attention when her mother left, and she's always been a bit of a drama queen. Her father was transferred to another state for work, so she decided to live with her mother because she di ...

Updated: Sun Jul 13, 2008

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Two-Year-Old Doesn't Quite Understand for 07/16/2008

Wed, 16 Jul 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Q. My 2-year-old daughter occasionally hits or bites her 1-year-old brother. My usual discipline is to put her in time-out for two minutes and then sternly tell her to say, "sorry" and kiss her brother when she gets out. She complies willingly with all of this, which is the problem — there's no remorse, and this method does nothing to prevent a repeat attack, sometimes only minu ...

Updated: Wed Jul 16, 2008

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It's Time For Your Son To Work for 07/20/2008

Sun, 20 Jul 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Q. I'm sure you have heard this all before. My 18-year-old son has just finished high school. He has managed to graduate with about a 57 average. We encouraged technical courses, as we felt that he was not academically interested (smart kid but hates paperwork). Even in those he managed to only scrape by because of poor homework habits. He is now lost without a future. The armed forces are out ...

Updated: Sun Jul 20, 2008

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Drug Seller A Poor Father for 07/27/2008

Sun, 27 Jul 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Q. My 30-year-old daughter had this fantasy about her ex-boyfriend from high school. They got together and had a son. This guy refused to sign the birth certificate because she wouldn't give their son a name he wanted. He doesn't work, is covered in tattoos and offers no financial or emotional support. He's a social outcast and uses and sells drugs. Why does my daughter constantly say that she ...

Updated: Sun Jul 27, 2008

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Addiction Recovery Takes Time for 07/30/2008

Wed, 30 Jul 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Q. I've been divorced for 10 years. My daughter was caught intoxicated and smoking pot. She was living with her mother and stepfather, but in the past she had asked to live with me. I said yes with the condition that she go into a program called Eckerd Youth Alternatives for six months.

After 10 years, my daughter has come home to me. This newfound fatherhood and full-time parenting brou ...

Updated: Wed Jul 30, 2008

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Don't Fight This One for 08/03/2008

Sun, 03 Aug 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Q. My daughter is a junior and a talented trumpet player. The high school she attends has a big music performance/drama/dinner production. She was told she had to pull all her hair back and put it in a bun because there weren't any girls in bands during the 1930s and '40s (the time frame of the production) and that was why she had to wear her hair that way. I'd like to know if you think I am cr ...

Updated: Sun Aug 03, 2008

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Here's A Clash Of Cultures for 08/06/2008

Wed, 06 Aug 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Q. My daughter has been having a terrible time adjusting to her in-laws, especially since her son was born. She calls in tears and vents to me so that she won't blow up as much at her in-laws, but it's building to a point where I believe it's affecting her marriage. I've asked her to find a family counselor, and I've offered to pay for the service. I'd like for her and her husband to figure out ...

Updated: Wed Aug 06, 2008

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Australian Girl Needs To Learn An I Can Attitude for 08/10/2008

Sun, 10 Aug 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Q. I got your name from a psychologist who said you were fantastic. My question is about my 7-year-old daughter. She seems to suffer from low self-esteem and slight depression, and is quite negative about herself. Eighty percent of the time she is happy. However, when she goes down she hits rock bottom. This seems to come mainly from rejection from her peer group. I don't really get depressed m ...

Updated: Sun Aug 10, 2008

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Guidelines To Certain Success For College Students for 08/17/2008

Sun, 17 Aug 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Each year at this time a new group of students go off to the exciting and challenging experience of pursuing their college education. The first year can be a difficult adjustment. They're faced with more independence, more challenge and more responsibility than they've ever had before. Many succeed, but many don't. Based on my clinical experiences with bright, capable students who have dropped ...

Updated: Sun Aug 17, 2008

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Bullying Is Hard To Stop for 08/20/2008

Wed, 20 Aug 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Q. My son is 14 and going into the eighth grade. He was faced with a lot of bullying issues this past year.

Although the school has a "no tolerance" policy, we find they do not stick to their own policy and rules. If my son reported something, the incident was minimized. It was often "they didn't mean it," or "they were just fooling around; they're friends." ...

Updated: Wed Aug 20, 2008

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Give Marriage Counseling A Chance for 08/24/2008

Sun, 24 Aug 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Q. My wife and I have children in elementary school. We haven't been happy together for some time. There are no glaring problems, and we rarely argue in front of the kids. We also show little affection toward each other. Some would say the children are affected by this more than we think. I know your suggestion would be to work on the marriage and maintain a two-parent household for the sake of ...

Updated: Sun Aug 24, 2008

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Neither Extreme Works For Sensitive Children for 08/27/2008

Wed, 27 Aug 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Q. My husband and I are expecting our first child soon. Both of us were very sensitive as children. I cried and he would get sick to his stomach. My stepfather decided that the best way to rid me of my crying habit was to tease me daily and encourage my siblings to do so as well (I was also teased at school). After six years I finally learned to ignore cruel words, but it left me with poor self ...

Updated: Wed Aug 27, 2008

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Writer Girl Wants To Be Advice Columnist for 08/31/2008

Sun, 31 Aug 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Q. I'm a psychology major in college, but I've wanted to be a writer since I was young. Music is a big hobby of mine, and I've also been looking into art therapy.

I'm very confused about exactly what I want to do for a career. Psychology is very intriguing to me. I'm really good at music, but I love to write. I was hoping to find some direction. How does someone become an advice columnis ...

Updated: Sun Aug 31, 2008

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There's No Medication For Lying for 09/03/2008

Wed, 03 Sep 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Q. I'm in desperate need of some advice regarding my 18-year-old son. He's a senior in high school and I found out today that he has a 67 percent in one class and a 70 percent in another; these are his only two required classes this year. The other classes are electives, and he's not doing great in those either. He's been skipping school and lying to his father and me about a lot of things.

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Updated: Wed Sep 03, 2008

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Not All Children Need Special Programs for 09/07/2008

Sun, 07 Sep 2008 00:00:00 -0700

Q. I have a son that had some developmental delays as a small child. He still works on them, but they're not obvious to anyone. We're concerned about a learning disability, but the school says that his schoolwork is "average" so they won't intervene. His older brother is gifted, and we believe he is too, but the school administered a test and says he doesn't qualify. He's a very philo ...

Updated: Sun Sep 07, 2008

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