Dear Mr. Berko: I bought 225 shares of Fannie Mae with $3,200 from my independent retirement account because you said it was good and that it had an implied guarantee from the government. Then it went bankrupt. How could you be so stupid and dumb? Now I could lose my home because I just lost my job. Every day when I listen to the news, I think we may be going to hell in a handbasket and I'm scared for my family and me. We piled up a lot of debts and now we're going to lose it all. Our only hope is an attorney whose advertisement we answered. I think he can eliminate all our debts for 10 cents on the dollar. I don't see any future for my family, and if my wife loses her job we will be finished. My 401(k) is down to $27,000 from $53,000 and my wife's 403(b) is down 40 percent to $32,000. I have $116 in my checking account. I'm mad as hell that I lost my job, but the attorney says I have a $25,000 to $100,000 claim against my employer for unlawful termination. Meanwhile, I can't make payments on our two cars, our boat, our camper, the recreation room we added to our home and some other things we financed. I'm 56 and we have no future because people like you recommended stupid stocks that blow up and because your President George W. Bush ran the economy into hell. The government's $700 billion bailout program doesn't help me. Yet it helps the fat cats whose money put your politicians in office. I don't expect you to answer for your bad advice. You are a jerk and a fraud but I feel better that I got that off my chest. — D.S., Oklahoma City

Dear D.S.: Ouch! You're as right as truth and fiction, and I deserve some of that criticism. I was a damn fool to recommend the preferred stock of Fannie Mae. And I was a bigger fool to believe Chairman of the House Finance Committee Rep. Barney Frank, D-Mass., who in a July 2008 television appearance said: "Fannie and Freddie are fundamentally sound — they are not in danger of going under." I compounded my damn foolery when I spoke to a member of the same committee a few days later and believed his comment: "Don't be concerned, Barney's got a good handle on this." Well, what can I say about politicians that hasn't already been said about hemorrhoids?

I'm glad you got it off your chest. But like it or not, you're part of the problem, too, as well as part of the solution. You are one reason the economy has snowballed into a hard-packed mess. The government's plan will work if we control our anger, stop finger pointing and let common sense triumph over emotion. It will work but there's no quick fix. This rolling snowball took at least a decade to gather momentum and go "splat" against the wall. It's going to take one to three years for the mess to melt.

So, millions of folks who rushed to embrace a culture of conspicuous consumption, leisure and debt have to make a U-turn to a culture of common sense, thrift and sweat. The cure will hurt. But it will be a lot less painful if we stop listening to media commentators whose shrill voices pierce your brain like a thousand dental drills. Those commentators have no more understanding of economic events than my two dogs, Albert and Einstein, and their stridulous deliveries continues to spread negativity into homes across the country.

There's lots of good economic news but that doesn't sell advertising. Meanwhile stay away from lawyers who use the print and broadcast media. They can't settle your debts for a dime on the dollar or get your IRS liability dismissed. Nor can they get $25,000 for wrongful termination or $50,000 from your broker because you bought Fannie Mae, Lehman Bros. or AIG. These sniveling sharks have discovered a new feeding frenzy (you) and are circling your remaining assets. You foolishly let your "give me, get me, buy me" gene override your "commonsense" gene. But there's no free ride unless you're a member of Congress, or a close friend, so you've got some heavy transportation costs to pay. And Congress is a darned good reason why pedophiles, drunks, felons, pornographers and lawyers should be prohibited from voting.

However, reducing your daily living costs can be made a lot easier if you go to Berkoblog.com, click on "UNCOMMON THINKING" and download "HOLY COW THOTS." It's a 10-page barrel of ideas on how a family can save between $4,000 and $12,000 a year.

Please address your financial questions to Malcolm Berko, P.O. Box 1416, Boca Raton, FL 33429 or e-mail him at malber@comcast.net. To find out more about Malcolm Berko and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

COPYRIGHT 2008 CREATORS SYNDICATE, INC.

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