Last week, I gave my daughter a small plaque painted with the words of a Japanese proverb.

It was a mother's gift to celebrate her new apartment and to remind her that she is ready for whatever life throws at her. I couldn't help but think, though, that the six little words at its center were a potent reminder for me, too, in these days following the primary election defeat of Hillary Clinton:

"Fall seven times, stand up eight."

There are plenty of Clinton supporters who don't want to hear this, I know, but it's time to brush the dirt off and pull ourselves up. Hillary Clinton's loss is not a failure for women unless we will it to be so.

A woman will not be elected president in 2008. This reality has knocked the wind out of millions of Americans, especially a lot of women, including me.

Like many women about my age, I grew up believing that a woman could run our country but thought I never would get to see her do it in my lifetime.

Then along came Hillary.

I was never so happy to be wrong than when she proved, one primary after another, that plenty of fellow Americans believed she had the mettle to be commander in chief.

And the chutzpah. Lord. Time and again, pundits and politicians predicted her demise. Time and again, there she was, giving another victory speech. It was enough to make a grown girl giggle.

I didn't always agree with Clinton, but so what? I'd voted for a lot of bozos over the years, and even the best of candidates have flaws. I didn't need Hillary Clinton to be perfect. I needed her to win.

Oh, to come so close.

There is a funereal quality to the coverage of campaigns once they're over, and Clinton's is no exception. Lots of "post-mortem" this and "life after" that; dreams "die," careers may or may not be "resurrected."

There are lots of references to mourning, too, especially in discussions about the letdown after a long and hard-fought battle. Grief has many faces, many moods, and it must be said that some Clinton supporters aren't at their best just yet.

Let a little time pass so that this disappointment can run its course. I'm not talking months or even weeks. I'm just asking for a little space for those who poured a lot of hope and energy into what they thought was going to be the culmination of a lifetime's worth of dreams.

Surely, nobody understands better that rush of adrenaline than those who dared to believe in Barack Obama. That's just one of the many things they have in common with the Clinton crowd.

Which brings me to those Clinton supporters who now insist they cannot and will not support Obama. They claim they either will vote for John McCain or stay home on Election Day. That sounds like disappointment devolving into hypocrisy.

We either stand for change or we don't. We believe in participating in democracy, or we don't. It's one thing to vote for McCain because you trust his road map for the future. It's quite another to do it out of some warped notion of revenge. A bitter retreat is no way to honor the first woman to come this close to being the presidential nominee.

Hillary Clinton lost, but she lost on her terms. She was no quitter, and that is a legacy that will only burnish with time. I am reminded of a recent dinner with several other female columnists from around the country.

At first, we talked about the usual things: family and jobs and keeping watchful eyes on the balance. But after a round of drinks — OK, maybe it was two rounds — we started whining about ugly reader responses, particularly from men who focus on our gender instead of our opinions.

Then one of the women mentioned Clinton and brought all of us to a hush.

"I don't know," she said, poking at the ice in her glass. "Some days I think this job isn't worth it, but then I think of Hillary and how she never stops no matter how hard they hit her. If she can take all that and still come out smiling, we can keep on, too."

Yes, we can.

Connie Schultz is a Pulitzer Prize-winning columnist for The Plain Dealer in Cleveland and the author of two books from Random House: "Life Happens" and "… and His Lovely Wife." To find out more about Connie Schultz (cschultz@plaind.com) and read her past columns, please visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

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